Choosing Friends...

that saturday went to firman's house, ada kenduri aruah. of all feast i've been to, this is the most shortest one. the ustaz and the rest read the Yassin, after dat, we recite Al-fateha, and LaillahaIllallah about 100 times, after dat, the ustaz say some prayers and that's it. very very short.

then i and firman talked about our NYP friends about asking them to go to the feast. one person invite firman to sentosa to have a picnic with the other NYP and ex-NYP friends, the strange thing is they didin't invite me, hmmm... so firman message them that he can't go. then he message again to invite them to the feast. that person kept quiet, didin't answer the sms. another person said that he don't go to these kind of feast. funny thing is, every saturday night, he always go to mosque for religious studies. another person, when asked in person, he was quiet for a while, and then he said, he can't go cos he got soccer. come on lah, u need a few while just to say u got soccer dat day? nampak sah bedek kan? hehehe.

when i thought about what firman said when 'that' person sms him about the picnic at Sentosa, i was quite sad because they didn't inform me why? why they told firman only? not me? i'm not their friends is it? or because they just don't like me around them? fuck man. this kinda "choose friends" thing started when i was in year one. and after some of them were gone, this thing happened again. Suck man. seriously. but at least its not as bad as last time.

last time, all the MIT malay guys and a few ECC guys sat together at one table, i got no more friends except them, and at that time i'm always with firman. so dat's why i was there too. i remembered that when i wanna open a topic, the topic tends to pause and die just like dat. so its difficult for me to make a conversation with them. some more i'm more of a less-talkative guy. dats why its difficult for me to open up a topic. but when they talk about football and girls, i can't join them, cos i don't watch english premier league becos i got no cable tv. about girls, well i don't know them! so most of the time, i sat there, quietly. so bored, so sick, so feeling like shit! dats why i always tend to go to school library whenever i have a break. i think its much better reading a good book then sitting down listening to them when i'm not interested and i'm not into those kind of topics. fuck them! but that was a long time ago. thank God it had ended. well i thought it had ended...